About NLQ
by Vyckie
I am a single mother of 7 wonderful kids. I am a former “Quiverfull” mother who dedicated my life to bearing and raising up “Arrows for God’s army.”
My pregnancies nearly killed me on several occasions, but I was so dedicated to the ideal that I continued to risk my life. I left the movement and my Christian faith, so that’s led to learning a whole new way of thinking and living. My kids and I are really having a blast and enjoying the freedom to be ourselves rather than ordering our lives according to some predefined roles based upon an ancient patriarchal society.
I am a former Christian homeschooling mother of seven who finally walked away from fundamentalism after our radical extremism drove my oldest daughter to attempt suicide. I was so convinced of, and committed to, the Biblical family ideals espoused by what has been termed the “Quiverfull” or “Biblical Patriarchy” movement.
Back in March of 2009, I worked with Kathryn Joyce on a Salon.com article about my involvement in, and escape from the Quiverfull movement. Since that time, No Longer Quivering has received a tremendous response. Within the first month, the site was nominated for the Canadian “F-word” Blog Awards for Best Feminist Blog International. The blog and forum are currently receiving approx. 70,000 hits per month.
I am working with several women to establish a charitable and educational organization to promote public awareness and support for families — particularly mothers — who want to leave the lifestyle. These women are very passionate about fighting back against what one NLQ forum member recently described as the ‘soul murder’ of women and young girls.
Mine is a candid story of one who was seriously sucked into a hate-filled worldview and was so committed that I was willing to die for the cause – and now I am equally bold in speaking up to say that the Quiverfull worldview and lifestyle overburdens women, enslaves the daughters and destroys families.
Since it’s beginning, No Longer Quivering has developed into a valuable resource of information regarding the deceptions and dangers of the Quiverfull philosophy and lifestyle. Several more former QF adherents are now contributing their stories to NLQ and our collective voice makes these Quiverfull warnings impossible to dismiss or ignore.
[...] why I find it no surprise that so many of the former QF/CP people (like Vyckie Garrison, for example) are so smart and articulate. People don’t join the movement because they’re [...]
[...] http://nolongerquivering.com/about/ [...]
Im so sorry to hear of your bad experience as a quiverfull mother. but you really shouldnt put that burden on anyone else. Some of us love to follow Gods instruction and guidence and arent all quacks like you. Maybe you should get your life right with God and live your life according to Gods will before you go and judge others.
K
Kailynn,
It sounds to me as though you are being more judgmental than the author. If Quiverfull works for you and you are happy, that’s wonderful. She was not, and she changed her situation to what worked best for her and her own family. Judge not, lest ye be judged.
Anon .. are you the wife/ mother of a quiver full family ? then what about your children .. ? what strikes me the most about these stories is the real concern for the children.. I am a daughter of a family of 8 children – 6 boys – It was a patriarchal christian family and I, in fact most of us, including our poor mother bear the scars. When my mother finally gave up and joined the “cult” her mind went out to lunch and it was if she was a stepford wife…
I have no love for my father, believe he is a complete hypocrite and used the veil of christianity to justify bullying misogyny. His controlling behaviour had it’s affects on my brothers as well. I have not had children myself and believe that some people should think hard about having offspring too – you don’t own your children, they have a right to have their own individual identity.
M
sorry Anon – I meant to address Kailynn
M
Why are you accusing the blog author of being a “quack” and attacking her? You sound like a nutcase, honestly, and coming here to pseudo-anonymously attack someone who is bravely speaking out about her experiences to try to help others shows your own cowardice. Go start your own site and bear your own witness instead of wasting your time and everyone else’s. I don’t recall anything in your supposed holy book that tells you to post nasty messages to unbelievers. In fact, it tells you to avoid us and to say your prayers in a closet, doesn’t it? Back in your closet now, shoo!
Gee, that’s all it took? The attempted suicide of your eldest daughter FINALLY woke you up to the fact that the life you willingly bought into was insane?
I’m glad you and your children survived the abuse that is endorsed by the Bible. I hope your children go on to find comfort, if they have to, in the arms of a more mainstream and sane religion.
What abuse does the Bible endorse?? The Bible requires husbands to LOVE their wives (I Peter, et.al.). Nothing in the Bible requires married couples to have endless amounts of children; people simply interpret scriptures different ways and have different convictions.
Vyckie, I worked in a business capacity for the Presbyterian Church in America’s foreign missions board for several years, which included quite a few Quiverfull families. I was brought up in a Christian family but was already on the way out of the church when I went to work for the PCA, and what I saw working in the denomination just hurried me the rest of the way out. I know that some of the couples were told straight out that the woman should not attempt to carry any more children, and in at least one case the husband refused to allow his wife further obstetric care as a result, as if that would remove the risk. After I left the organization, I really wondered how long she lived after that. I had heard him say that if God intended her death, “He would call her home and send another mother for (their) children.” (As if mothers are interchangeable, like Lego blocks?) But until that happened, the husband intended to continue “business as usual” with the only change being home births instead of hospital deliveries.
I was surprised that I didn’t see at least one woman die while I was there, but most of the families in the mission field were fairly young and healthy in the first place (it was a young denomination). I have to believe there are deaths that I didn’t hear about in the movement at large.
I applaud your courage and wish you the best of luck in founding an organization to support others who share your experiences.
This site makes me sad.