Seneca Falls 2 Convention Issues a Demand for an Apology from Complementarians for the Harm Fostered by their Sub-Christian Doctrine

On July 24, 2010 at the conclusion of the Seneca Falls 2 Evangelical Christian Women’s Convention, the newly established Freedom for Christian Women Coalition issued a list of concerns and demands to Drs. Randy Stinson and J. Ligon Duncan, III of the Council on Biblical Manhood and BIBLICALWomanhood (CBMW), demanding that they repent of their aberrant and sub-Christian doctrines.  (These individuals will receive original copies of the document on Tuesday, July 27, 2010, 10 AM, CST, according to the projection of Fed Ex tracking information.)

Shirley Taylor, founder of bWe Baptist Women for Equality, wrote in her self-authored Demand for an Apology from the Council on Biblical Manhood and Biblical Womanhood  (the document signed by the founding members of the Freedom for Christian Women Coalition):

“We demand that the Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood acknowledge the harm that has been done to the church body by The Danvers Statement on Biblical Manhood and Biblical Womanhood, confess it as sin, and denounce it . . .”

One might also add that they should acknowledge that their screed which scapegoats, objectifies, and demonizes all women has had a detrimental effect on society at large.  Presumably and in accordance with their own divinely inspired objectives, Christians claim to serve as THE moral signpost for secular society, but CBMW has facilitated more harm to women than many of the secular groups that they so acerbically decry.

In fact, many liberal secular feminist organizations provide far more functional and tangible support to women of all faiths.  Christian women have been abandoned by their own Christian ministries who have been influenced by this ideology, forcing them to turn to secular agencies for support and care where they are received without discrimination.  Many liberal, secular, and civil organizations demonstrate a better example of the concepts of “Love your neighbor as yourself,” “Love your enemy,” “Bless those who curse you,” and “Do good to those who despitefully use you,” than do those who follow CBMW’s ideology.  

The Freedom for Christian Women Coalition grieves deeply that their fellow beloved Christians and that the Christian Church has failed women of all faiths, particularly those within their own belief system.  They hope that their efforts and call to justice will foster unity and mercy in the Body of Christ, bringing healing to the Church, the of working unity and a spirit of mutual respect, Christian love, and reconciliation among the supporters of the Coaltion, CBMW, and those women and children who have been regretfully and unintentionally harmed by the misguided ideology.

The Seneca Falls 2 Conference addressed what many Christians identify as the root cause of the many sins against women fostered within Evangelical Christianity.  The Conference addressed many aspects of the regretful outcome and end effects of the poisonous pedagogy promoted by the Danvers Statement ideology.  Though the discussion was not limited to the following topics, the conference speakers confronted these primary issues:

• Jocelyn Andersen addressed the connections between the subjugation of women and the practice of slavery, a subject noted at length in her new book, Woman this is War:  Gender, Slavery, and the Evangelical Caste System.
• Cynthia Kunsman exposed the deceptive techniques of manipulation, Spiritual Abuse, and Undue Influence utilized by complementarianism and CBMW.  Read more HERE about how the Danvers Statement has fostered physical abuse of women and children.
• Shirley Taylor revealed the deceptive and disingenuous nature of the Danvers Statement and related ideology in her Dethroning of Male Headship, specifically pointing out how CBMW promotes priestcraft by establishing men as the spiritual mediators for women.
• Waneta Dawn taught the nature and harmful effects of psychological and domestic abuse within marriage and the family, explaining the ways in which the Bible has been distorted to promote abuse of all varieties.
• Janice Levinson of the Protective Mothers Alliance International exposed the world wide trend of discrimination against mothers fostered by the Court System and many Evangelical churches.
• Kate Johnson of the Christian Coalition Against Domestic Abuse discussed the ignorance about domestic abuse demonstrated by far too many Christian churches and the tremendous resistance within sectors of the Evangelical community to address the needs of women and families.
• Doug Phillips of the Oleander Church of God exposed the ignorance of the use of Gender Biased English Translation Theology which distorts the redemptive message to women and men alike found in Biblical Texts.

For more information, the anticipated release of video coverage of the proceedings, and for information about the Freedom for Christian Women Coaltion, please visit www.SenecaFalls2.com and the Seneca Falls 2 Blogspot.

The participants of the Seneca Falls 2 Convention and the Freedom for Christian Women Coalition would like to express their deepest thanks and heartfelt gratitude to Vyckie Garrison, No Longer Quivering, and the NLQ website readers for their much needed support of their efforts.  

Cynthia Mullen Kunsman, RN, BSN, MMin , ND

www.UnderMuchGrace.com

(Discussing the phenomenon of Spiritual Abuse in Evangelical Churches)

Discuss this post on the NLQ forum.  Comments are also open below.

Speaking this past weekend at ”The Baby Conference,” in San Antonio, Texas, Vision Forum speaker, Doug Phillips gave a talk entitled, ”A Hopeful Theology of Miscarriage” ~ a summary of which, Phillips shared on his blog.

After taking the position that not all children who die go to heaven ~ but only the “children called of God,” Phillips discussed “the significant role that the unborn and young children play in God’s’ covenant of grace …” and then added:

Though acknowledging the sadness and loss of miscarriage — with he and his wife Beall having lost two unborn children — Doug offered two key points of hope that the loss of a child in the womb can bring:

1. The hope of discipling our families on the priorities, nobilities, and sacrifices of Motherhood.
2. The hope that tragedy provides to model confidence in the sovereignty of God to your children and the world.

Somehow ~ this is supposed to bring comfort to mothers who have lost children through miscarriage. Plus, it should be a great lesson about the nature and dealings of God for children and ”the world” too!  Ack.

Here’s the ”piercing question” that really turned my stomach as Phillips’ words reminded me of the spiritual manipulation which was so much a part of my old Quiverfull world:

“What if miscarriage was God’s mean [sic] of showing mercy and love on a human soul, and if He chose you to be the honored vehicle to usher that child into eternity?”

And then he says, “Miscarriage is for a moment; a soul is forever.”

Mr. Phillips ~ your God is an evil monster! 

May He go the way of Molech, Baal, and all the other sons-of-bitches tribal gods of the ancient Near-East that nobody has taken seriously for centuries.

So how is it that God is showing mercy and love to a baby when He chooses to to kill it ~ or at least, not to continue sustaining its life ~ His way of ”discipling” families with regard to moms’ priorities (the noble ones will sacrifice) and as an object lesson for children and “the world” ~ and when He uses our wombs to accomplish His capricious display of sovereignty, we should feel honored?!!!

What does this have to do with God’s covenant of grace?

And women should readily submit our wombs to the capricious whims of this Big Guy, why?

Yes, our mother-hearts will often compel us to sacrifice ourselves for our families.  But unlike the Patriarchs, we women are not so cruel as to willfully sacrifice our own children to populate Hell.  With no assurance that the precious lives which we grow in our wombs and hold in our hearts are among the “children called of God” ~ why should we cooperate in their creation for eternal destruction?

My apologies if Phillips’ flippancy with regard to what most women experience as a most devastating loss and an unbearable tragedy trips any PTSD triggers.  His wolf-like insensitivity-disguised-in-spiritual-virtue sheep’s clothing certainly grabbed hold of my heart and my head and twisted my being into knots of confusion, dismay and anger.

Discuss on the NLQ forum. You may also post your comments below.

Vision Forum Ministries (the not-for-profit arm of Vision Forum) capitalizes upon connotation and summarizes their family and Pro-Life oriented Mission Statement by describing themselves as Christians who follow patriarchy as well as their created concept of “multigenerational faithfulness.” 

Trusting people often fail to recognize the darker doctrines beneath the pleasant pictures connoted including “Protestant Exclusivism,” their own version of Darwinian social engineering, and their view which defines daughters as a “dynamic means” for a man to “extend his influence into other covenantal family units.”  The group’s claims of an uncompromising Pro-Life status also beguile and mislead trusting followers while they concurrently recommend alternatives like stoning rebellious teens as well as the refusal of surgery for women carrying a life-threatening tubal pregnancy.

Properly attributing statistics and applying their meaning can be no easy matter, even if a person has been trained in their use.  Much to my own mortification, I realized that I falsely reported the statistics related to a ten year estimated maternal death rate owing to ectopic pregnancy, misrepresenting it as an annual figure.  Based on the incidence of ectopic pregnancy maternal death which accounts for 6-9% of all maternal mortality, according to the Lancet’s worldwide estimate for 2008, ectopic pregnancy would account for approximately ONLY 25,000 of those deaths.  Today, I “enjoy” the humble honor of catching my own demonstration of human error by reporting it myself.

But not so with some extremist groups.

When pointing out the unethical nature of the Vision Forum policy on ectopic pregnancy, one Christian organization has noted that Vision Forum ignores errors, citing the example of their policy regarding the “unmitigated disaster” of woman’s suffrage.  In response to pressure from critics, Vision Forum merely deleted and buried the documentation of their former position without any hint of redress.

I noted that Vision Forum and Samaritan Ministries made another gross error in their reporting of live births resulting from ectopic pregnancy.  Both ministries published that 60-100 live births have resulted from these rare cases.  I found no such statement in the reference specifically footnoted in the original work, nor a statement of the necessary 50 year time frame for these births.  I suppose that this could be human error in the original work, but it does not account for failure to comprehend the meaning of the data in their other listed sources.  Could this presentation style used by Vision Forum’s President, an attorney, alter perceptions about ectopic pregnancy in the same manner that the psychology of numbers affects jurors in the courtroom?

Upon contacting organizations including several different Academies of Obstetrics and Gynecology, the National Right to Life organization, and data specialists within the CDC to verify the figure of 60-100 live births, none of these agencies had any knowledge of the existence of data supporting this suspicious claim.  Even with the willing cooperation of all of these professional groups, I have only been able to verify a rough dozen of successful, documented births to date.

I plan to keep looking, seeking some services through the CDC for which I will have to pay a fee.  An arm of the CDC keeps data that does not necessarily make it into published statistics, but the process of obtaining this data is long and rigorous. So that information will not be forthcoming any time soon! (I chuckled when it was suggested to me that I focus on the 9% fatality rate for ectopic pregnancy from among all maternal death rates.)

I was greatly encouraged by the fact that everyone with whom I’ve discussed this matter at said agencies expressed great disdain that any Christian would recommend that women should refuse surgery for an ectopic pregnancy prior to tube rupture.  Professional people and Pro-Life people at these agencies expressed confusion and shock.

One physician noted to me on the phone that 95% of fallopian tubes do rupture in the case of tubal pregnancy, and I wondered if they were citing this study that I recalled when pouring over the data reported by the World Health Organization.  Samaritan Ministries published that the dangers of rupture are surprisingly moderate and occur in only 20% of cases, though more may rupture when seeking medical care, seeming to suggest that the morbidity experienced by women with tubal pregnancies is actually nosocomial or treatment-induced.

I spent some time on the phone with the National Right to Life organization today in my efforts to track down statistics on this matter.  I also expressed my concern that Dan Becker of Georgia Right to Life has been quoted in support of Doug Phillips’ views and publicized as a speaker for Vision Forum’s upcoming “Baby Conference,”giving the impression that Mr. Becker wholeheartedly supports the Vision Forum position and that National Right to Life does as well.   

 I was ASSURED informally and emphatically that National Right to Life In NO WAY supports the Vision Forum position on withholding treatment in the case of tubal pregnancy.

Cynthia Mullen Kunsman, RN, BSN, MMin , ND

www.UnderMuchGrace.com

(Discussing the phenomenon of Spiritual Abuse in Evangelical Churches)

Discuss this post on the NLQ forum!

A follow-up to:

Vision Forum, Samaritan Ministries Take Extreme “Pro-Life” Position on Ectopic Pregnancies

Following the previous post about Vision Forum’s plans to advance their thesis regarding surgical treatment for tubal pregnancy before confirmed death of an unborn baby as the ethical equivalent of elective abortion, several insightful questions have been presented in different areas around the blogosphere including the NLQ Forum.  They are worth noting.

The discussion raised some interesting questions about the actual risk (morbidity and mortality) related to ectopic pregnancy as weighed against the chance of a non-tubal ectopic pregnancy producing a live birth.  Refer to this HERE at Under Much Grace which includes some great diagrams and statistics from sources including the CDC and Lancet.

Most notably, ectopic pregnancy accounts for 6-9% of all maternal deaths in the US. Assuming that these statistics also apply to other developed countries and those countries that do not provide state-of-the-art care to their citizens, this translates to a rough single year death rate of 25,000 worldwide (in 2008 based on Lancet’s estimate) due to ectopic pregnancy.

And the odds of a baby from non-tubal ectopic pregnancy surviving the pregnancy? One in 60 million. That means that worldwide (assuming a general birthrate of 134 million annually for the past 30 years), only one such birth occurs every 6.7 years, based on a now current and somewhat stable global birth rate.

Vision Forum will laud one baby every 7 years while 25,000 mothers die in one year? Hmmm.

This information out of Lancet and from the CDC paints quite a different picture than Samaritan Ministry’s publications when they reproduced Vision Forum’s new dogma.(I think Vyckie’s karma ran over their dogma!)

Is it worth speaking out on behalf of women with ectopic pregnancy, even if it risks the downplay of the significance of the rare live births that result from viable ectopic pregnancies? What will the liberals say?

(I think that they will respect those who are trying to hold their own groups accountable. Liberals think we are hypocrites when we ignore our own problems while pointing out theirs! And they’re right to think so.)

From “dangermom”: What connection does the Schatz Family have to Vision Forum’s decree regarding ectopic pregnancy?

I believe that both issues point out Evangelical Christianity’s avoidant behavior regarding provocative issues that are not easily understood, are unpleasant, and might result in a loss of contributions from people who think it is unchristian to confront error. Rather than engage the serious natures of both these dilemmas, most ministries have completely ignored the matter. Rather than showing Christian compassion to what I am told is a fringe group that doesn’t equate to a “significant demographic,” suffering people who are precious to God are thrown away like so much inconvenient trash.

“Here’s the thing about the Schatz’s–they weren’t a crazy family. They were right there in the mainstream of QF, doing exactly what the Pearls’ book told them to do–to keep “switching” the defiant child until her will was broken and she submitted. They interpreted her cries as defiance, since she wasn’t “whimpering” like the Pearls tell you to expect. All their Christian friends liked them and considered Mrs. Schatz to be a gentle, kind, loving mother. . .

But since the Pearls’ advice is abusive and not Christian at all, a lot of children are severely harmed by it. And a few are going to die, until we get the word out there that it’s an awful book that should be thrown out and never followed. Lydia will not be the last victim, unless conservative Christians rise up and throw the Pearls out of their midst.

The real kicker about the Pearls and their ilk is that if you believe them, you–loving, well-socialized, reasonable you–will accidentally beat your child to death out of love and duty.”

Why is this decree such a big revelation?

This has been the unspoken and understood message within the ranks of the group from the beginning because birthing conveys spiritual blessing as if it were a sacrament.

Manipulative groups that use spiritually abusive tactics have two sets of rules: the Formal Doctrinal Statements and the “Unwritten, Understood Rules” that are conveyed through rhetoric, propaganda technique, and social pressure/proof. This example demonstrates the rare transposition of a provocative vaguely implied rule into a formal one. (Cultic groups generally avoid making direct and definitive statements.)

In June of 2008, Vision Forum posed the following question from their Witherspoon School of Law and Public Policy on its website:  “If abortion is the murder of a human being, is it biblical to oppose all abortions?”  The organization addressed this topic in a series of blog posts on the matter, determining definitively that tubal ectopic pregnancy did not justify surgery to remove the fatally compromised fetus along with a pregnant woman’s fallopian tube. 

Despite the medical fact that tubal pregnancies prove to be fatal to the fetus in all cases, the Vision Forum group determined that any surgery which ends any ectopic pregnancy to rescue the mother constitutes an elective abortion, unequivocally qualifying as a utilitarian decision which amounts to the murder of the already terminal fetus.  The group also improperly downplayed the incidence, morbidity, and mortality associated with tubal pregnancy.

Though the Catholic Pro-Life position supports surgical intervention in the case of tubal pregnancy to save the mother, Vision Forum’s dangerous position continues to spread throughout sectors within the Evangelical Christian community. 

Samaritan Ministries, a Christian medical needs-sharing ministry that provides an alternative to “third party payment” medical insurance that is not subject to laws governing the medical insurance industry, republished Vision Forum’s position in their materials ostensibly as a moral imperative.  Samaritan Ministries ambiguously suggests that such care might be an expense that their organization would refuse to cover, potentially qualifying as a condition that involves unethical behavior. 

Per the ministry’s policy and the subscriber’s agreement, the group denies payment for treatment of any conditions resulting from sinful behavior (e.g., sexually transmitted disease, substance abuse recovery, etc.).  Vulnerable subscribers may potentially be rendered without coverage if their physicians opt for early treatment.  By capitalizing on fear and distortion through undue influence, Samaritan Ministry’s stance complicates the medical decision-making process for affected families, delaying appropriate care at best or precluding care at worst.

Vision Forum seeks to advance this position on ectopic pregnancy as well as their views on corporal punishment for children through the vehicle of their “Baby Conference” in July in San Antonio.  Dan Becker, President of Georgia Right to Life was invited to speak, falsely suggesting that all state and national level Right to Life Organizations also share Vision Forum’s views.  Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar (natural parents of 19 children of the TLC/Discovery show) have also been invited to the conference to participate as keynote speakers and receive an award. 

The group also plans to address spanking, likely as damage control following the recent death of Lydia Schatz who died as a consequence of the stringent corporal punishment methods that are staggeringly popular among the group’s following.   Presumably, Vision Forum seeks to capitalize upon the notoriety of the Duggar Family to surreptitiously advance both of these agendas.

Though EthicsDaily.com reported on this issue of ectopic pregnancy in August of 2008, not one Evangelical Christian Pro-Life or Biomedical Organizations agreed to make any public statements specifically confronting Vision Forum or Samaritan Ministries regarding their views about ectopic pregnancy.

 Cynthia Mullen Kunsman, RN, BSN, MMin , ND

 www.UnderMuchGrace.com

(Discussing the phenomenon of Spiritual Abuse in Evangelical Churches)

Discuss this post on the NLQ forum! 

 Also, I am leaving comments open on this post so that non-members can add thoughts on this topic too. We’re hoping to raise a stink here to maybe get the right to life groups to address this situation.

by Vyckie

The Quiverfull folks at Vision Forum are gearing up for their Baby Conference: A Historic Family Summit on the Triumph of Life Over the Culture of Death to be held in San Antonio, Texas this coming July.  According to conference promotional material:

As the world lauds barrenness for economic and personal convenience and marginalizes the value of our aging populace, we purpose to celebrate life and to explore a myriad of practical and theological issues that are pertinent to Christian families of the twenty-first century, such as: adoption, home birth, the coming cry for euthanasia on the horizon as our elderly generation increases, and the many blessings that come from raising children in the fear of the Lord.

One of the highlights of the Baby Conference will be a special “Ladies Tea Time” in which Michelle Duggar will be presented with a Mother of the Year award for “her heroic example to millions as a role model of Christian motherhood and her defense of life.”

As a former Quiverfull “mom of many” ~ I have to say that what Michelle modeled for me was an incredibly high standard of Christian motherhood. 

She inspired me with a vision of what a wonderful testimony my own family could be as I gave over my reproductive life into the Lord’s capable hands and trusted in Him to strengthen and empower me to raise up the children He blessed me with to be dedicated, faithful, on-fire Christians willing and able to do mighty exploits in the ever-intensifying battle against the advancing forces of darkness in this sin-sick nation.

Michelle made the whole big-happy-homeschool-family-living-for-Jesus picture of submissive helpmeet and prolific motherhood seem not only incredibly attractive ~ but fairly straightforward, uncomplicated … and doable.

All it takes are some basic administrative skills: organization, time management, delegation … plus, a biblical child-training program … and character education ~ to be sure the children are also inspired to cooperate … um, what else?  a piano teacher?  Too bad we couldn’t afford ATI ~ but if that had been truly necessary, surely the Lord would have moved us to Texas and provided more money (a lot more money).

We’d need to have God’s blessing, of course ~ but not to worry: with our wholehearted dedication to the Lord and unwavering adherence to the principles which He was revealing to us through the Word of God ~ as long as we were in His will ~ God’s blessing was pretty much guaranteed.

Having God’s blessing meant that whatever we lacked in competency, ability, health, time, money, etc. ~ the Lord would make up for so long as we remained faithful to His calling.

Isn’t that what the verse promises, after all?  Blessed is the man who has his quiver full of them?  So how could we go wrong?  Surely, if Michelle could do it with her mega-family ~ I could do it with “only seven” arrows in our quiver.

In the Quiverfull economy, “heroic Christian motherhood” simply means producing an abundance of children ~ trust the Lord, have babies ~ then keep on trusting that He’ll take care of the rest. 

What I found out after investing over a dozen years, plenty of money(I’d have thought nothing of forkng out the Baby Conference admission price of $85 per individual), every ounce of my energy ~ not to mention, my whole heart, mind, body and strength ~ is that the Quiverfull lifestyle is a perfect set up for child neglect. 

The truth is, there is absolutely NO WAY that one woman can be a decent ~ let alone good or exemplary ~ mother to so many children.

There. I said it.  It’s just impossible ~ plain and simple.

In the two-plus years since I left the QF lifestyle ~ I’ve been living off the collateral from all the effort invested in developing organizational skills and my sanity-preserving ”gift of delegation.”  Much of what I learned (lower your standards, use the crock-pot, etc.) from the Titus 2 ladies has really helped to keep us afloat. 

But recently, my health has not been so great (the result of too many pregnancies combined with PTSD has been adding up to frequent episodes of anxiety and depression) ~ and try as I might ~ I can’t keep up ~ and so I’m feeling completely overwhelmed.

So okay ~ I thought, I’ve done this before ~ even adding in homeschooling (which I’m no longer doing) ~ and managed for the most part to keep up.  Maybe it might help to do a little refresher course? ~ revisit the QF hints and tips which were so helpful in managing my little flock of “precious lambs” ~ in an effort to find ways of getting a handle on the huge amount of responsibility that comes with having so many children.

The only problem is ~ nearly all that helpful large-family management advice is dependent upon the underlying QF-parenting philosophy ~ which basically amounts to turning your kids into easy-to-control automatons and de facto family servants.

How does Michelle do it? 

Truthfully:

The older girls do the cooking. (Question #3)

The older children and their “buddies” do the cleaning. (Question #3)

She relies on “the buddy system” ~ older children care for and teach the younger ones ~ as explained by Jim Bob here:

M. DUGGAR: Yes, it is great, the buddy system. This house would not work if we didn’t have the buddy system. The older children mentor the younger ones. They help them with their little phonics lessons and games during the day, help them practice their music lessons. They will play with them or help them pick out the color of their outfit that they want to wear that day, and just all of those types of things.

(More on the Buddy System here.)

Training her daughters to be keepers at home explains how Michelle manages to feed her brood. (She delegates.) The Buddy System explains how Michelle manages the basics such as hygiene and homeschooling. (She delegates.)

What about the children’s social and emotional needs?  As a former QFer, I well remember the way we “moms of many” reassured ourselves with the thought that, while our quiver full of children are undoubtedly denied copious amounts of one-on-one time with Momma ~ the Lord has provided built-in friends and playmates so we could rest assured that our children were still getting plenty of love ~ an abundance of love, in fact ~ from each other. 

From Examiner.com: … watch those little details, like Jackson clinging to Jana for comfort after he was lost in the airport (while his parents laugh blithely in the background) or Jennifer crying for Jill whenever she’s upset. You can call it being a buddy all you want — the truth of the matter is that those girls are parenting their little siblings … (Again ~ she delegates.)

“Michelle Duggar is the real deal,” noted Doug Phillips, President of Vision Forum Ministries. “… She is clearly a mother deserving of this award, and we are excited to honor her as ‘Mother of the Year.’”

I disagree.

Consider this: According to the Christian Newswire report, “Jim Bob and Michelle will share their story together, and Michelle will also be hosting a separate Ladies Tea Time, which is close to selling-out in the two weeks since the event was announced.”

Please tell me who is going to be taking care of baby Josie while Michelle is in San Antonio accepting this mothering award and playing Tea Party with fellow QF moms who are privileged with the luxuries of time and money to attend this event? 

Seriously.  By the time of the Baby Conference in July, micro-preemie, Josie Duggar will only have been home from the hospital for a few months ~ she will need constant care for quite some time to come.  Is Michelle planning to delegate that care to the older girls?  Is she planning to bring little Josie along?

Michelle’s in-person acceptance of VF’s Mother of the Year award is … is … what? I hesitate to use the “H-word” ~ but, Wow ~ is it ever tempting! 

But, of course ~ the show must go on. 

Nobody gives Angelina Jolie a mothering award ~ because she pays others to take care of the kids for her.  Michelle Duggar does not pay her cooks, housekeepers, private tutors and nannies.  I don’t doubt that she has the very best of intentions, but honestly ~  reality dictates that at most, we should recognize her as a superior administrator.

If anyone in the Duggar household is going to receive a “Mother of the Year” award ~ shouldn’t it be the ones doing the majority of the actual mothering ~ that is, the four oldest daughters: Jana, Jill, Jessa, & Jinger?

I suppose the Vision Forum crowd looks at these four young ladies who graciously comply with the Duggar Family vision ~ and concludes that their joyful service is evidence of Michelle’s heroic Christian motherhood. 

The rest of us see a handful of beautiful girls and wonder, What the heck?!  Where’s all the drama?  ‘Cuz you know there ought to be plenty of drama with all these females in the family.  There’s something disturbing ~ even alarming ~ and certainly not praiseworthy about the mother of teen girls who don’t push their “buddies” back into Momma’s arms and say, “Take care of your own kids ~ I’ve gotta get ready for my date!”

My thanks to Kathryn Joyce, author of Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement, for bringing the Baby Conference and Michelle’s “Mother of the Year” award to my attention.

Discuss this post on the NLQ forums!

by Vyckie

In a letter to No Greater Joy’s followers, Michael Pearl has requested prayer “that God will give him clarity of mind and spirit to answer wisely all the questions that are put to him” on tomorrow morning’s edition of The Early Show on CBS.

Pearl also asked supporters to pray “that the report and the interviewer will be honest and fair.” 

I get the feeling that in requesting that the report be “fair,” Michael Pearl is not actually wanting the interviewer be honest.  My hope is that the interview questions will be direct and pointed.  Here is just one of several honest questions which I’d like to see put to Pearl during tomorrow morning’s interview:

Mr. Pearl, you teach that the consequences of all sins are equal in Eternity, before God.  How does this teaching influence your followers’ willingness to punish their children severely for what typically would be considered ”minor infractions”?

And here’s what I believe is a “fair” ~ frightful, but true ~ response to the question I would pose to Pearl:

“In Eternity, before God, all sins are alike …” this is precisely the idea which compels many godly parents to employ Pearl’s child training advice ~ to apply “the rod,” switch, or plumbing supply line as often and as severely as necessary to bring the child into willing compliance and “instant, joyous obedience.”

If a child who tells “a little white lie” is in the same danger of eternal separation from God as a serial murderer, said child’s parents would not be truly loving if they did not take their child’s sin of lying (or mispronouncing a word) every bit as seriously as if the child had actually committed murder.

See the logic?

Such “logic” is obviously flawed to those who do not accept the basic premise.  But for those unfortunate parents who do buy into the idea that their children are in danger of eternal damnation ~ it is a chilling calculation with the potential for deadly consequences.  Andrea Yates comes to mind. 

So, yes ~ I hope The Early Show report is fair and that the interviewer’s honest questions will wipe the smirk from Michael Pearl’s face ~ and his chicken’s too.

Discuss this post on the NLQ forum.

Michael Pearl has issued a scornful brush-off of critic’s charge that No Greater Joy Ministry’s “child-training” advice incited Kevin and Elizabeth Statz to beat their 9-year-old daughter, Lydia to death using quarter-inch plumbing supply line.

by Vyckie

I am nearly speechless with anger after reading a link postedby NLQ forum member, Asteli which highlights Michael Pearl’s “Laughing” Facebook note response to his critics.

“It has come to my attention that a vocal few are decrying our sensible application of the Biblical rod in training up our children. I laugh at my caustic critics, for our properly spanked and trained children grow to maturity in great peace and love.”

A vocal few? Who Is Speaking Out Against Abuse? ~ I’d say there are more than a few “caustic critics” who are outraged over the “application of the Biblical rod” which lead to the death of Lydia Shatz.

“Numbered in the millions, these kids become the models of self-control and discipline, highly educated and creative-entrepreneurs that pay the taxes your children will receive in entitlements. When your children finally find an honest mechanic or a trustworthy homebuilder, it will be one of ours. When your children apply for a job it will be at a company our children founded. When they go to a doctor, it will be one of our Christian children that heals them with cutting edge innovation. When your adult kids go for therapy it will be one of our kids-become-psychologist that directs them to the couch and challenges them to release their self-loathing and embrace hope for a better tomorrow.”

Numbered in the millions ~ that’s a terrifying thought ~ but it is true that No Greater Joy Ministries is a 1.5 million dollar a year business. If no one was buying, reading, and implementing the Pearl’s potentially-deadly child training advice, we could laugh right back at him ~ but as it stands, this is no laughing matter.

Models of self-control and discipline?  Yes ~ undoubtedly, children trained by Pearl’s methods will have extraordinary self-control and self-discipline ~ anyone whose ever survived the terrorism of physical and emotional abuse as a child will testify to their ingrained ability to tow the line ~ to jump when the abuser yells, Jump! and to never dare let go and just be a carefree, happy, inquisitive child uninhibited by the abusive parent’s seemingly-omniscient watchfulness and omnipotent control.

So far as Michael Pearl’s boast regarding the superiority of NGJ-trained kids ~ it is doubtful that children whose natural inquisitiveness has been stifled by their parents’ expectation of “instant, joyful obedience” will retain the sort of creative, flexible, risk-taking personalities which characterize entrepreneurs and successful business professionals.

I well remember paging through my copy of To Train Up A Child as a dreamy-eyed young mother desperately seeking the very best, most godly way to raise my children.

In his book, Michael Pearl suggests tempting a child with a bite of their favorite food ~ placing a morsel within the child’s reach ~ and when said child instinctively reaches out for the food ~ Switch their hand once and simultaneously say, ‘No.’  Repeat as many times as necessary until the child is trained not to automatically grab for whatever he or she wants ~ but rather, to automatically look to the parent for permission before reaching out to take the desired food.

Even in my Quiverfull-induced stupor ~ I recognized the cruelty of such parenting advice ~ to deliberately tempt your child and then smack them when they take the bait?!!  I remember thinking, didn’t Jesus teach us to pray “lead us not into temptation”? If it’s not okay for our Heavenly Father to lead us into temptation ~ how can it be right for earthly parents to do this to their children?  I did not bother to finish reading the book.

Thankfully, I joined the local Le Leche League group for breastfeeding support and was introduced to Dr. William Sear’s “attachment” approach to parenting which jived with my natural inclination for gentle mothering.  Admittedly, I still did occasionally spank my children ~ but thankfully, I stopped short of purchasing the quarter-inch plumbing supply line in my quest to have happily obedient children.

“When your children grow old and realize their mortality and seek to make peace with their Creator, it will be one of our children that shares with them the message of God’s love and forgiveness.”

Holy shit! ~ I am having difficulty finding words to express the anger ~ the fury ~ which I felt rising up within me as I read Pearl’s utterly preposterous claim that children raised according to his methods will be sharing the message of God’s love.  Pardon my French, but ~ WTF?!! 

Since the No Longer Quivering website was started almost a year ago, former Quiverers and their children have taken the opportunity to share their heart-wrenching stories of spiritual abuse ~ and the sheer horror of it all is so overwhelming that readers are sickened and often need to take a break ~ it’s just too much to bear! 

Sadly, many of us ~ myself included ~ cannot hear the words “God” and “love” in the same sentence without a roll of the eyes or the need of a barf pail.

“My five grown children are laughing at your foolish, uninformed criticism of God’s method of child training, for their kids-my 17 grandkids-are laughing . . . because that is what they do most of the time. They laugh when Daddy is coming home. They laugh when it is time to do more homeschooling. They laugh when it is time to practice the violin and piano. They laugh when they see their Big Papa coming (that’s me) because Big Papa is laughing and they don’t care why just as long as he laughs with them.”

God’s method of child training.  Need I say it?  This man is delusional!

“My granddaughters laugh with joy after giving their baby dolls a spanking for ‘being naughty’ because they know their dolls will grow up to be the best mamas and daddies in the world-just like them.”

Not to mention sick and twisted. 

“People all around the world, in places like Russia, China, Germany, New Zealand, Guatemala, Peru, Africa, and fifty other countries are laughing with joy because after applying the Biblical principles found in our books they finally have happy and obedient children.”

Take note people: parents around the world are laughing with joy because after beating their children into unquestioning submission, their kids no longer have the will to resist the extinguishing of their personhood and the murder of their very souls.

Do you think that Michael Pearl’s lunatic ranting cannot possibly get any worse? Think again:

“Even my chickens are laughing . . . well, actually it is more like cackling, because they just laid another organic egg for my breakfast and they know that it was that same piece of ¼ inch plastic supply line that trained the dogs not to eat chicken.”

Shameless and unrepentant, Michael Pearl shows not an ounce of remorse or regret ~ not even an inkling of pity for Lydia Shatz or her parents who are living the nightmare of knowing they killed their child for the glory of God.

Revolting as Michael Pearl’s mockery is ~ the response of his followers is all the more disturbing:

“Laughing with you Mike and Debi!!! LOL”

“Strangers and friends alike, are always asking why our kids are so happy! Thank you, Pearls, for your consistent encouragement over the years.”

“The world needs more laughter, of the wholesome kind!”

[2] http://www.chicoer.com/publicsafety/ci_14364274

[3] http://cbs13.com/local/Parents.Accused.Of.2.1504691.html

[4] http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/articles/general-view/archive/2001/may/01/in-defense-of-biblical-chastisement-part-1/

[5] http://www.khsltv.com/content/localnews/story/DA-Deadly-Child-Abuse-Case-Linked-To-Biblical/v9e-rmj-dk6t5b2Dx8U_gA.cspx