The recent “Born to Breed” episode of “Secret Lives of Women” has attracted quite a bit of attention from practicing Quiverfull women ~ and several QF/P blogs are discussing my story and NLQ. I appreciate that quite a few of these blog commenters are giving thoughtful consideration to the message here.
But many others are insisting that my Quiverfull “conviction” was a burdensome form of legalism rather than a true calling from the Lord. It is frustrating to read their comments as these women dismiss my Quiverfull experience as irrelevant by concluding that what we were doing in our family was not the same heartfelt, Spirit-led decision based on our sincere love for the Lord and our desire to be open to His wisdom and guidance in this very personal area of our reproductive lives as what they are currently doing in their own families.
So ~ feeling a bit (okay, maybe a lot) defensive, I went and dug up a piece of writing from my “quivering days.” This one happens to fit in the timeline of where I’m at in my story ~ I wrote this shortly before I became pregnant with my 7th child, Wesley. While this started out as a personal letter to a friend, I later modified it for publication in several QF periodicals including “Unless The Lord Magazine.”
I’ll follow this one with a bit of commentary at the end:
Quiverfull and the Life of the Mother
A friend of mine (the local La Leche League leader) is under heavy conviction right now concerning the use of natural family planning. I can understand her hesitancy to completely give this area over to the Lord as she and her husband are only 21 and already have two children. Recently, “Katherine” posted a question on QuiverFull Digest (an Internet discussion group for families who are trusting the Lord with their “family planning”) which basically asked the question, “How far are we supposed to follow this ‘Quiverfull’ conviction? What if the life of the mother would be jeopardized by pregnancy – would it then be prudent to abstain during the woman’s fertile time? If so, where do we draw the line between being ‘good stewards’ and taking complete control over our reproduction?”
Dear Katherine,
I noticed your post on the QuiverFull Digest recently asking whether it’s acceptable to use birth control in a situation where the mother’s life is in danger. I did not want to respond to the Digest – but, for what it’s worth – here’s my take on that situation:
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This letter which I wrote to Jonathan Lindvall via his “Bold Christian Living” email discussion list fits into the time period of the latest installment of my story. This one is total crap ~ I was trying so desperately to figure a way to get Angel to accept and embrace the godly, quiverfull lifestyle which we’d chosen for our family ~ I think that my desperation is quite apparent in this rather pathetic letter:
Dear Mr. Lindvall,
Thank you so much for your ministry — you have been a great encouragement to my husband & me. I have a concern that I thought you might be able to address as you come from a godly Christian background. You may have already dealt with this subject and if so, could you please direct us to the appropriate tapes?
My husband & I both come from very ungodly families and grew up amidst drugs, alcohol, violence, perversion, occultism, etc. As a young man, my husband, Warren, was serving time in jail for possession & sale of drugs when he turned his life over to the Lord and experienced deliverance from drugs and alcohol. As for myself, at age 18, I knew that I was a hopeless sinner who deserved Hell — I lived with that miserable conviction for quite some time before the Lord revealed to me His grace & I was saved through faith. When I surrendered my life to Jesus, it was a dramatic conversion experience and I knew beyond all doubt that I was a new creature, a child of God and eternally secure.
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