by Calulu
Just posted the latest installment of Millipede’s story up on our new Patheos space at http://www.patheos.com/blogs/nolongerquivering/2012/05/millipede-part-3/
Our space at Patheos is a work in progress. As you can see there are no links to our suggested reading list, or our forums or pictures of Vyckie or anything remotely like what you see here. It’s not because we’re doing away with those things, not at all, but because Vyckie and I are still in the process of editing the new space, trying to construct a more user-friendly version of NLQ. We really want NLQ to be an easy to navigate site chock full of information on leaving dangerous situations of spiritual abuse.
I don’t know if any of you have tried to grow grapes but if you don’t watch what you’re doing, both with grapevine horticulture and web design it’s easy for it to spiral into a large disorganized heap. Grapevines have to be carefully pruned and shaped all the time during the growing season or you end up with a big mess that hasn’t produced the amounts of fruit you could have had. It’s the same with websites, you have to keep things pruned, updated and moving forward or you end up with mess that is hard to find the information.
My passion and vision for the new version of NLQ is to help as many women coming out of harmful fundamentalism as possible. Especially in these times when it seems like many different parts of society are attacking women in some form. We seek to bring hope, healing, a sisterhood of support to those that will be finding our site in the coming months. Both Vyckie and I are committed to this goal.
What about the forum? I keep getting asked. There will be some changes going on in regards to the forum. We will no longer be posting threads in the “NLQ Blog Posts” section. Patheos encourages it’s members to keep discussion of content on the actual posts in the comments section. This is particularly important with engaging new readers, particularly quiverfull-minded people. The best way to keep an actual give and take conversational exchange is on the blog.
The “Hot Topics” and “General Chat” sections will make up the majority of the forum for now. Those will be linked to as we keep making changes to our new site. We will be closing the “QF Survivors Corner” for now. The reason behind that is that we have had a mole in that section for some time that has shared some of the personal information members have posted in that section. It’s not safe to continue posting in that section and we really want all of NLQ to be a safe and supportive environment for our readers.
Thanks for making this one of the most supportive and encouraging sites for hurting people! You all rock!
Peace and love,
Calulu
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Michelle says, Never enough babies!
Cult of Personality – Adventures in Recovery
A few weeks ago I took my daughter out for an celebratory lunch at her favorite Greek restaurant. She’s gotten acceptance letters from all of the colleges she’s applied to plus we really needed to touch base, take a time out together from the busy of our lives. Over sovlaki and hummus she started talking about what she would say to our former pastor Patrick if she ran into him again. She had run into him an few months ago and had been so surprised she’d just hurriedly muttered out pleasantries before leaving him as rapidly as a man with his pants on fire would run for the lawn sprinklers.
I had to ask her what she would say to Patrick if they were face to face. She blurted out something like “F**k you, motherf**ker and thanks for ruining my f**king childhood!” before laughing. We both laughed imaging the faces of those sycophants and hanger on-ers Patrick was always surrounded by if she let the F word fly.
That’s one big marker of a cult-like unhealthy church atmosphere, if everyone treats the pastor as if he is either the world’s most famous rockstar or the big toe of Jesus touching down on the earth to be adored. We saw that, participated in the pastor-pleasing behaviors too, perhaps not to the depth that many did but we did it as a family. It’s dangerous business for the most part. When everyone is busy kissing the rear end of the pastor or bowing down to his every whim and word it starts to look like a one man show with no real room for the Lord or anyone else. Plus the pastor starts to think he’s in control or assumes control. It also breeds unhealthy competition among the members all vying for the attention and favor of the pastor.
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